I’ll call her Valentine, since I never got her name. Nor did I ask. Valentine telephoned me several days ago and asked, “Can you cast a spell to make somebody love me?”

I’ve grown accustomed to people calling and asking humdinger questions, but this one made me pause. No one had ever posed that scenario to me. Why would she think a medium would cast spells? Then I remembered all those pesky ads placed by psychic scammers that I’ve seen in newspapers – the ones that guarantee things like “curses removed” and “protection from the evil eye” and “lottery numbers predicted” and all that other rubbish.

Valentine said, “There’s a guy I like who’s ignoring me. All I want is a little spell to make him pay attention to me.” Then, she added hesitantly, “I’d be willing to pay you.”

No, thank you, I thought, then sighed, remembering all the calls I’ve received from people who gave their money to fraudulent psychics. It makes me angry, how those charlatans will promise anything for a buck. And then they call me, many in tears, wondering if they’d get back the thousands of dollars they gave to a bogus psychic who promised to “clean their money.”

Then I wondered how old my caller was. She sounded about sixteen. But that didn’t matter – I’d give her the same answer even if she was sixty-six.

“I’m sorry,” I said, “but casting spells is not what I do. Besides, I believe it’s unethical to try to override someone’s free will.”

“His free what?”

Now I knew I was dealing with a younger person. I tilted my chair back and got comfortable, ready to give Valentine a hopefully short philosophy lecture on personal responsibility, free will and how the heart works.

“I’m a Spiritualist,” I began, “and one of our beliefs is that we have free will to make the choices that govern our life. And when you try to influence another person’s free will, you could create a negative outcome. That person may end up resenting you for attempting to manipulate him. It’s coercion. Think of it this way – do you really want to use some artificial means to get someone who really isn’t interested to have a relationship with you? It’s like the difference between lust and love – lust is temporal, and lasts for a few moments, whereas love is deep, and can last for decades.”

Valentine answered quietly, “But I’m a good person.”

“I’m sure you are. So why don’t you show him you’re a good person? Take a walk with him in the park, or meet him at a coffee house after school—“

“How do you know I’m in school?” Valentine asked.

Because I’m psychic, I thought, trying not to laugh. “If you want to be loved, be a loving person. That’s all you need to do.” I listened for a response, then said, “Let me ask you this – what does this boy like to do? What does he like to talk about?”

Valentine was quiet for a moment, then hung up. I sympathized with her as I remembered what I was like as a teenager experiencing my first crush. Whether you’re an adolescent or a middle-aged divorced person, it can be hard to cultivate a true friendship or develop a relationship. Trying a spell is just attempting to make quick fix. I just prayed that Valentine wouldn’t fall prey to someone who would take her money and leave her with a broken heart.

If you have any questions or comments on this subject or on any other spiritual matter, feel free to write me at mail @ And please visit me again!


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